Updating

It is now February of 2011.  It has been awhile since posting, but I am now trying hard to keep up on it.

I have been meeting with 3 other women on a consistent basis.  We all struggle with food, overeating, and the addiction that it is.  We just finished a great book Love to Eat, Hate to Eat: Breaking the Bondage of Destructive Eating Habits, By Elyse Fitzpatrick.  http://www.shop.elysefitzpatrick.com/Love-to-Eat-Hate-to-Eat-LEHE-BK.htm .It is a great book and really took me to a new place when I look at this journey to lose weigth.  It isn't so much about losing weight, although that is the natural benefit.  It's that I always put food before God and that becomes my idol.  When I am stressed, happy, sad, anxious, bored, tired, etc. the first thing I want to do is eat, not run to the King of Kings and be filled with Him. This book addresses this issue and it is so good.  Very hard at times, but also very good for someone like me, who depends on the comfort that food brings.  It was really never meant to do that for me.  Food is for fuel, nutrition.  It's meant to keep me going, to keep me living.  It's supposed to be enjoyed, but not over indulged.  We are next moving onto a new book and study.  Made to Crave, By Lysa Terkeurst (madetocrave.org).  Check it out.  It's good stuff!

Anyways, I have come to realize more and more that this journey to weight loss isn't about numbers and pounds shed.  It's about becoming intimately close to Jesus and learning to run to Him when I feel the need to over stuff.  It's a journey of making the right choices.  Taking on life and going to the cross when it gets difficult and not just about bending the elbow to stuff food in my mouth.  I know that sounds kind of funny, but for a girl like me.  It's my addiction.  This thing called Food.  You can't live without it which makes it all the more challenging to overcome.  But in the process of meeting with these ladies and getting into the Word more, I am slowly learning.  I am losing the pounds, eating way more fruits and veggies than I have in the past and learning to eat correctly. It isn't mastered.  I make many bad choices, but it's a work in progress. 

I am down to 186.4 as of Monday.  It's taken me a while to get there.  I feel great though and just look forward to shedding even more. 

still here...

Just in case you ever check this I am still trying to lose this weight and change my lifestyle. It definately has not been easy nor has it happened as fast as I would have liked it to. As of today I am down 23.6 pounds since January 1st. I was hoping to be down much further than that by now, but it has been gradual and I am actually ok with that. I think doing it really slow has helped me to actually not gain. I am giving my body time to adjust so I don't feel like I am starving as I lose more. I am thankful that slowly I am learning how to eat healthy and make wise choices. It isn't always easy and I don't always succeed, but I am doing it little by little. My goal is to be at 185 by Oct. 1st. and by November 20th, to be at 170. Those are my # goals, but I am not focussing so much on the number as much as I am to what I am eating and physically doing. The numbers will come eventually. Well, I love you my sister. Keep pushing through. We can accomplish this....

Still going SMH!

It's weird how one day you feel great and the next you don't. It's weird how when I weigh in and see a loss I all of a sudden losen up a bit and get relaxed and start eating bad for the next couple of days. I am going to try really hard this week to stay focussed even when I see a loss in numbers and hopefully I will see more and a quicker weight loss. At least until I get to PMS! LOL! Those two weeks always seem to stump me, but slowly I am making changes and I hope it becomes a lifestyle and not just a way to lose weight. If I look at it as it's just my goal to get down to 150, then what will happen once I get there? But I am looking at it as a lifestyle change, one that I can maintain. So even though I really want to lose 3 pounds this week, I am not focussing on that. My goal is to workout out atleast 5 days and to eat right! Fruits and veggies instead of garbage. I hope you can join me soon again SMM. I have missed doing this with you and I know you are busy and life has been hectic, butI do encourage you to take care of you. It feels good. It is hard and takes discipline, but we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength! One day at a time...little by little....~SMH

I am doing it!

Well, I have been consistent again for a month and it is slowly but surely paying off! I went up and down for so long and it is nice to be seeing the scale going down again! I am down to 196.2 as of today and on track to keep losing. I have been working out. I do workout videos in home and do some jogging and walking outside. I am trying hard and pushing through and honestly since I have been exercising my mind feels better than it has in quite a long time. It is refreshing, yet hard doing it the old fashioned way, but that is the only choice I have and I feel that in the process it is teaching me so much and forcing me to learn to make good choices. There are still times when I want to give up and throw in the towel, but it is my goal to be at around 155 by Dec. 1st and if I keep up what I am doing, either way, I will be a success. It feel so good to be taking care of myself finally and trying to lose weight.

blah, blah, blah

It has been awhile.
No excuses other than laziness.
Nothing has changed.
It has been two months, and not a pound less than what I was 2 months ago.
It sucks.
It is discouraing.
But today is a new day.
I want to lose 50 by December 1st.
That is my new goal.
I CAN do this.
I HAVE to do this.
It sucks, but it is a journey and I am not through with it yet.
So, here's to a new day, a new look, and hopefully a new beginning to seeing the pounds come off.